The Moroccan Standard

“Ooh she’s got standards but you’re cool if you’re at twenty five                                   Ooh she’s got standards til you put a twinkle in her eye” ~ The Rifles

Or, as defined by my dictionary:

Standard (n): a level of quality, an accepted example of something against which others are judged or measured

I have always wanted to go to Morocco. I once expressed this wish and a guy I worked with at the time gave me the ‘sage’ advice that I should only go with a man who wouldn’t trade me in for a camel. Bit harsh, I thought, surely I’m worth more than just one camel?

Anyway, this was too daft not to be repeated to my friends and it quickly became the Morocco Standard; a benchmark by which any man I thought about dating was measured. Forget tall, dark, and handsome, just will you trade me in a for a camel if we go to Morocco? It certainly made for some interesting first date conversations.

After a time the Morocco Standard became a bit dull. My friends and I toyed with a few other random standards but the best one was the Champagne Standard. In essence, I was only interested in a man who knew how to correctly open a bottle of champagne. This is absolutely NOT how they do it on the podium after an F1 race. You hold the cork and turn the bottle. Shocking how many people can’t do this properly.

Then there was the Kettle Standard. Quite simply, I wanted a man with a decent kettle as mine was rubbish. Yes, I know I could buy a new one but that’s hardly the point, is it? Note for the application of this, it doesn’t work if he moves in but doesn’t bring the kettle.

So what about you guys? What are your unusual Standards? Please say it’s not just me that has these? Thoughts (& applications to take me to Morocco) on a comment box-shaped postcard, please.



3 thoughts on “The Moroccan Standard

  1. LOL. Have never considered trading my wife in for a camel, I do open champagne properly (and know how to pour it properly) and I bought a bells & whistles kettle yesterday!

    And I’m a huge fan of The Rifles!

    But as a married man of 32 years, it would be totally remiss of me to actually answer your question 🙂

    Although, if I did, it would be “would she make me a mug of Heinz Tomato Soup when I felt poorly?”

  2. I remember a school trip to Africa; an all-male party apart from me and one female teacher; am sure there was an offer of camels when in Cairo!

    I like the idea of the champagne standard; although I generally end up opening the bottle myself. Men that bring champagne are always welcome though.

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