I Miss You

“Don’t waste your time on me you’re already the voice inside my head (I miss you miss you)” ~ Blink 182

Or, as defined by my dictionary

Miss (vb): to regret the loss or absence of


I miss my family. Scattered in a few bits of the country, I don’t see them as often as I would like. All my siblings have stayed in my flat but my mother is too disabled to travel and has not seen the last two places I have lived in. I miss her seeing me, in my space, seeing am I ok. I miss going shopping with her, I miss doing the crossword with her, I miss the days she used to make bread. I miss my dad being long-suffering and giving me lifts hither and thither. I miss Sunday dinners and Friday night pizzas and the old table in the kitchen with the seat in the corner that was ‘Michael’s middle’ until he grew and I came along to take the place.

I miss my best friend. Again, lives far away. Always at the end of the phone and never lets me down. I hope he thinks the same of me. Our friendship has lasted over twenty years and survived many an argument and many a boxset. But talking about Game of Thrones over the phone isn’t as much fun as watching it together and shouting at the tv.

I miss having pets. My first cat was squished in the road when I was thirteen. RIP  Merry. I’ve never had another pet of mine own; family cats, family dogs, family rabbits. I now have two cats that visit to sleep on my bed. But I miss having a pet that owns me.

I miss friends that I think are still friends but I never see. I miss those shared in-jokes, the lines that only they say and are screamingly funny. I miss their take on life, even when we disagree. I miss their wisdom and their kindness.

I miss friends I’ve never met. People online who become real, become a part of your life then go and leave a void. Online friendships can be very transitory but no less real for that.

I miss lovers I’ve never had. The ones of my imagination, the dreams that sustain you through a dark night when there is no-one to hold you close. I miss mattering to one special person, so much so it makes me cry.

If I know you and haven’t seen you, be it since yesterday or ever, I miss you.



5 thoughts on “I Miss You

  1. Don’t miss things that were. Experience is transitory and waits for no-one – it will leave you arts to love and enjoy, but if you over-use these arts then they will turn to ghosts to haunt you.

    Don’t miss things that may come to pass. The juggernaut of possibilities will get you, if you stand in the road looking directly at its headlights – but if instead you step to the side, and watch it circling with all of the other traffic, it will stop to pick you up.

    And for the things that are current – don’t miss them, do them.


  2. I love the way you write.
    I miss so many people & things too.
    I also miss parts of the me I used to be.
    Spontaneity mostly, I think …
    I TRY to adopt the Buddhist approach of being present & focusing on who I’m with here, now, today, this minute ~ “real life” or virtual.
    Both equally important to me.
    At the same time, I honour the sadness within.
    It’s there.
    To deny it is to reject a part of who I am and how I feel.
    I remain ever the Libra.
    Always seeking balance.
    Thank you for another heart-warming, thought provoking post.
    Love. Lily xxx

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